Identity

Sometimes, there is this strong sense of loss. It has been half a decade now, away from home. The person in me that had left home five years ago has evolved substantially since then. And now, the distance between me and that left-behind value system gapes so large, that I often find myself floating. Uncomfortably. Cut off from my roots.

Visiting home doesn't feel the same any more. I have just drifted too far away, and find myself a painful misfit in those familiar surroundings. And therefore the sense of loss. As if I no longer have a home to go back to, some place I truly belong. And it is at times like this that I shut myself up, alone, in the hushed darkness of my room, searching for myself. Searching for a spirit, that has silently evolved within, and has now become my only home, my roots, and my identity.

All you who sleep tonight

All you who sleep tonight
Far from the ones you love,
No hand to left or right
And emptiness above -

Know that you aren't alone
The whole world shares your tears,
Some for two nights or one,
And some for all their years.

~ Vikram Seth

The Day after the 4th!

Taadaaaa.....the first Post Pujo 2008 Blog is here! (I am a wee bit gleeful at the thought of beating the head honchos of the organization at it). The Pujo yesterday was simply amazing and did bring to life the oft used cliche of a "rocking event" . Rocking it was...and how! The "Protima" was, to say the least, beautifully different and innovative to the E. I never knew till yesterday that FREE food could taste that good and as for the cultural program- it was effortlessly enthralling. But most of all, what I cherished was the feeling of belonging that the event exuded which made it a Pujo to call my OWN. A Pujo I have been proud to be associated with the past 4 years.
Before I retire back to bed with the liner smudged panda eyes (speaks volume of my post dance laziness), I would just like to thank everyone involved in what transpired yesterday for making it so beautiful. The people who've worked silently behind the scenes and those who've been vocal in front, from the President ofthe organization to the unknown smiling face who served food and everyone in between who made yesterday a warm bouquet of beautiful memories to be cherished for a long, long time.
A special thanks to my "partners in rhyme"- Payel, Sonia, Radhika and Tallin. I had an wonderful time performing with all of you.We did an amazing job yesterday and I would not have had half as much fun as I did had it not been for the friendships I forged with all of you over my hyperventilating bouts of practice, loud (and if I may add sometimes corny) jokes and hearty laughter. Your patience with me was indeed amazing!
Thanks again BSSM for the lovely evening...and a home away from home.

Quiz during pujo

Bhor Theke Chutochuti, Haansi Aar Lutoputi
Chalo Jai Dekhe Aasi, Tumi Ami Didi Masi
BSSM Korche Pujo, Felche char-e pah
Korbo Shobai Anondo, Bah bah bah bah bah !!!

Uporokto choratar rochoyita ke?
Jodi apnara er uttor jaanen, tahole apnader shokol-ke janai BSSM aayojito Quiz-er nimontron. There would be prizes. The time would be posted along with the schedule soon. So keep yourself informed.
See you all at 4th Oct, SPSC then !!

Lalmohon Babu hole bolten...!!

Lalmohon Babu nijeke aar shamlate na perey bolei fellen.."bujhlen moshai....aie jokhon thekey Sushil Kumar aar Vijender Kumar-er bronze pawaar khabor-ta peyechi... bhetore bhetore ki je ekta iye hochche ....ki bolbo moshai....shokaal thekei kintu daan chokh-ta lafachilo"...ektu themey "jyamon Aravalli-r Dacoits-der pichone tara korte giye ekta chapa uttejona hoyechilo sheirokom feel korchi.....lom gulo khara hoye giyeche, dekhun".... Feluda haath-er paaNch-ta angul shunnye tule diye, majhpothei Lalmohan babu-ke thaamiye dilen..."Vijender-er bronze-ta ekhono confirmed noi....ota slver-o hote pare abar gold-o hote paare....abar apni ja bollen ...Bronze-o hotey paare, aar aiete jeney raakhben Vijender-er opponent-ra apnar Aravolli-r Dacoits-der thekeo bhoyonkor, era holo giye Cuba theke jhanu boxer shob"...
emni shomoi hotat Telephone-ta kring krring kore bejey uthlo....abar ki natun rohosshyo ??....na onnyo keu ??....amar mukh-e tokhono ordhek jyam makhano paunruti..Feluda expect korchilo....ami phone-ta tulbo....amar obostha dekhe nijei ponchom baar krrring howar porei ekta upper cut bhongi-te reciever-ta tule nilo....
ami thik Feluda-r telephone-r kotha gulo follow korlam na....amar mathai tokhon breakfast sesh kore...Lalmohan babu-r bahannotomo upponnyaash-er molaat-ta ki rokom hoyeche sheite dekhar chinta !!
phone-ta rekhe Feluda bollo "ekta guess korto, ke phone korechilo, bhodrolok-ke tui chinish"...ami bollam "Tirthankar Babu...Elgin Road-e bari, jaader kaal raat-e bari theke oshtodhatu-r murti churi giyeche"...Feluda uttor dilo "na thaak paarbi na............. phone korechilen Krishnendu-r Baba"....Lalmohon Babu bollen "ke Krishnedu ??? Shoptopodi-r Krishnendu, you mean ....the grrrreat Chobi Biswas"....
Feluda:-"Corrrrrrrect Lalmohan babu...uni bollen Krishnendu aar Rina Brown naaki ekhon Beijing-e, oder biye-r 50th anniversary palon korbar jonnyo oNra Olympics dekhte giyeche...sudhu husband-wife.....ora naaki Vijender-er fight-ta dekheche stadium-e boshe.....ebong fight-ta howar porei shoja naki Chobi-Dake phone korechilen...tai bhodrolok amake onar khushi howar golpo shonachilen ...sesh korlen aie bole..Felu tomakei first phone-ta korlam kintu....ayi NDTV-ta ekbar chalato...dyakhi headlines-ta...."
ami remote-y teen-te botaam tepar porei channel-ta peye gelaaam...LIVE dekhaache desh-er Prime Minister, Jawaharlal Nehru congratulatory message ..."soul of nation, long suppressed, finds utterance..." ...................bhodrolok-er chokh-er tolai jol dekhlaam money holo !!

Celebration of Mediocrity !

Demands of mediocrity are simple to fathom, it asks you to feel joyous about Abhinav Bindra's gold, it tells you to clap heartily for a Zakir Hussain's performance and expects you to write-off a Prosenjit-enacted Bengali movie potboiler. It does not tell you to add a new brick on the wall. It ensures that you be a good audience. It is a self-sustaining institution and primarily feeds on itself. There are Arundhati Roy-s and Amartya Sen-s and Saurav Ganguly-s and Moni Bhowmick-s who had been entrusted with the task of taking care for setting new precedents and new standards, which fall in the domain of excellence.
Funny thing about mediocrity is this, it wants to grow. Picture this "When I grow up, I want to be a Metro"- written on a Calcutta tram on a B.B.D Bag-Shyambazar route. It is saying, I know I am a mediocre but I want to end up being excellent because I can see what can be achieved by excellence, a 75 minute strainous tram journey can be reduced to a 15 minute Metro ride. It is this sheer sense of acknowledgment that mediocres indulge in, which has sustained them for years.
As Subhabrata Ganguli posed this wonderful query "What's driving?". I think a one-word answer will be excellence.
The queries are this, with our mediocrity can we define a new cult, a new standard for others to follow. Maybe we won't hog the covers of Newsweek, Guardain or Cosmopolitan, maybe we won't have Patents against our names, but can we create a platform, a podium where we can give ourselves that chance to be excellent and thereby define a norm that hasn't existed before in any form in any shape? Can we celebrate our mediocrity with a bottle of Champagne and luchi-alu-r dom, can we sing "Chorono dhorite diye go amari" and at the same time grab our Subway sandwhich while listening to it? Can we be seemingly sacrilegeous yet be sacrosanct and thereby do an Adam Smith by co-authoring a book named "Theory of Mediocre Bengali's Moral Sentiments?"

বাঙলা ব্লগ

মাতৃভাষায় ব্লগ লিখলে কেমন হয়?

Updated Official BSSM Website

Hi Everyone,
As the countdown has begun for this year's biggest event, BSSM has started to prepare for this. Here is the official site of BSSM, renovated and updated!!!!
http://www.tc.umn.edu/~bssm/ with a new look.

What's driving?!

I have the habit of analyzing myself ... often. And for the last several days, I am trying to figure out "what the hell drives me?".

I still don't know the answer ... but there's no harm in speculating. And sharing it with the outside world! The nice thing about writing is, I can always say to myself that the thought is now shelved, and I can now go to the next analysis problem. And the backup*/escape plan (I am a big believer of backup) is that I can always go and say "those were only my speculations, little venting-out ... that was only for showing-off in blogs, that's not the real me. Here's the real me". And the loop continues.

* backup plan: the backup plan is just to cover myself in the low-probability event of someone other than me knowing me better.

So, here's the output of ii = 1: % I live in MATLAB world, not C, C++, C#, C-flat

SEARCH FOR THE WHEN:

It's always Fall ... that's when I go into 5th gear. At times I think, that it should be Spring or Summer. Probably that's more expected in Minnesota. But re-analyzing, I think I just keep doing** nothing during Winter, anticipate doing something in Spring (still dont do), get frustated in Summer (by still not doing), and then in Fall I do too much.

What goes up must comes down (a terribly cliche). And so I go back to the do-nothing mode during the next 6 months of Minnesota winter.

** doing - Ok, I go to work, eat, sleep, etc. But is it really worth doing those without any sense of joy and contentment?

SEARCH FOR THE WHY:

I thought and thought ... it cannot be associated with anything but Durga Puja! The anticipation for excitement of 2 weeks of fun is so intoxicating, that it has become a habit in the last 30 years or so. So, if nothing is going on, I feel a great need to DO something during Fall, just so I can maintain my routine, and do it over and over again in years to come.

I think the WHY is also associated with few other factors. First, Fall in Minnesota always reminds me of my first visit to USA, Aug 1998 as a student of UofM. Man, ... eveything looked so excitingly and new, I still remember the feeling.

Another reason for the WHY - this is also the time of the year when I first met my better half! It was in Fall of 1998. (I will stop elaborating on this anymore; I strictly want to restrict myself to my analysis-mode.)

Yet another reason for the WHY - Diya (she's almost 3 now) is born also in Fall - Sept 2005. She's pretty much the center of my world!

I will end my first iteration (and my 1st-ever blog) with that.

So, what's driving you?

Meeting Minutes

.....Ticking away the moments, that make up a dull meeting....people fighting over
whether at all we should go for a Durga Pujo or not at the first place....for most,
the inital plans looks like boiling down to a "Shorot-er shingaaara party", too
sacriligeous, too informal....and there is this other set of self-proclaimed
radical thinkers who propose the new order, they propose, they dispose,
they live and die for it......and Barun comes into rescue, handing over
Kollol with a peg of Chivas Regal exposing the likes of Partha
to the viscissitudes of a collaboration, which has been named as
Bengali Students Society of Minnesota

College-friend (Abhishek Bhattacharya)

Dorja khullo Tapaser Bou Misti,oder biye hayeche 4-5 bachor hallo. Last year oder ekta futfutte chele hayeche thik Rajputturer maton.



Misti praye chitkar korre tapas ke daklo"Ai dekho ke eseche…SamareshDa tomar e ki abastha,Bull fighting kore asle naki!!!".

Mistir kathi kara take Samaresh gaye makhlona bollo amake kichu khete dao pete chuchoo dakchee…



Ermadhye tapas ese geche.Tapas Samareshder batcher one of the bright Students, Samaresh o Arekjan bright student chiloo. Abasya Tapas ke dekhte Samareshere theke besi bayesher lagge..Misti Ranna Gharre cholle gello Sam er Jalkhabarer byabastha korte.

O bolla hayni na Samaresh ke sabai Sam dake.



Tapas ke Samaresh sab khule bollo,Tapas kinchit hmmm haa ar dirghya niswas chara besh mon diye sunloo..Tapaser college porar samayer nostalgia ferot aste thaklo. Tapas er mastuto dada ar tapas mille besh kichu rumal churri tiffin churrir rahasya samadhan korechilo.



Pradyot Da i clue gullo ke miliye samsya samadhan korto kintu Tapaso o khub karitkarma bhave clues ber korto. Se praye 10-12 bachor agge bhavli kemon ga sir sir kore othe. Ajj abar Pradyot Dar katha mone porche. Tapas praye bhulei gechilo je Sam bosee ache.Abasya iti madhye Misti ekta uchu kasar thala te ek1 dista fulko luchi aar pathar ghughni sange lord cham cham ,rassagolla ar Burdhmaner mihidana ar Sitabhog. Sam sange sange khabar upor akaraman kore dillo ebong go grshe khete laglo. Tapas uthe giye ekta trunk call book korlo Pradyot Da ke call korte habe. Pradyot Da ekhon Full time Satya Anwesi hayeche… Se aajj ai sankate Sam ke help korte paarbe ar tapas nijeo rahasyer gandho peye bhetore bhetore romanchitoo bodh korlo.



Tapas Misti ke bollo ektu amar First Aid Box ta ano to ektu Naux Bhum mere di and Tincture iodine lagiye di Sam ke.

Er madhye fone beje uthlo trunk call lege geche Pradyota liner anno dikee…

Tobuo nistaar nei (Sayeed Abbas)

oboseshe sahos obolombon kore samaresh ghure takanor chesta korlo, kintu pichone ghorar aagei matha'r pichone ekta baari te se agyan hoye porlo. koto khon ei bhabe behoosh hoye porechilo samaresh'er kono khyal nei. jokhon gyan firlo, se dekhlo je ekta highway'r paashe se pore aache ekta jhoper pichone. raat kete din hoyeche. mathar pichone haath dite jomaat bandha rakto haathe elo. porone ekhono sei jama kapor i aache. kichu khon samaresh hotobhombo hoye pore roilo. eki hocche tar saathe? kichu ghonta aage se chinta korchilo ki kore serial dekhbe aar ekhon ei ki tar obostha! muhurte jeno somosto life paalte gelo. dui baar nijeke chimti katlo. sopno noito. hotath se nijeke aar samlate parlo naa. fupiye kende uthlo se. kaar khoti koreche se, je keo tar upor ei bhaabe badla nebe? sucharita di'r saathe tar kono somporko chilo na jar jonno ei ghotona ghotbe.

oboseshe kanna thamiye, nijer bhabna chinta ke soro goro korar chesta korlo somoresh. prothom oke jaante hobe se kothai aache ekhon. ditiyito ei niye kono sandeh nei je keo taake fasiyeche. eto khon sei chithi police peyeche, ebong samaresh ke flat e naa peye, somosto kolkata'r police taake khujjche. aayin er kaache ekhon se criminal. police'er kaache giye ki korbe somoresh? ki bolbe taader? ki kore taar upor aasha arop porishkar korbe? naah, ekhon aar kono raasta nei. oo aar kolkata firte parbe na. ekhon haathe somoi chai, todonto korte hobe ke taar ei sorbonaash korte chai.

er ektai upai. samaresh'er sahajjo chai. aar ekmatro tapas chara, samaresh ekhon kaoke biswas korte paarbe na. tapas samaresh'er chotobelakar school'er bondhu. ekhon thaake durgapur e. dvc te chakri kore as assistant engineer. ja korei hok samaresh ke durgapur pouchote hobe.

pocket e haath dhukiye dekhe je maatro kuri taaka aache. gotokaal ei taaka ta peyechilo as change ekta misti'r dokaan theke. tokhon theke pocket e roye geche. highway'er ek dhar dhore haatte thaklo samaresh. beshi khon bujhte laglo na kothai aache se. kaachei dekha jacche bandel'er power station. oke train dhorte hobe. ekta auto bhara kore station elo samaresh. adh ghonta pore local train dhore soja bordhoman. bhaggis kono TT othe ni train e. bordhoman e ese baaki poisa te bus'er ticket kete sondhyete durgapur chole elo se. kaal raat theke kichu khai ni. somosto sorir kahil hoye poreche. ei obostha te tapas'er ghore elo. calling bell dui baar baajate dorja khullo......

Prothom onko Tritiyo drisshyo (Baishali Bakshi)

Parar lok hajir hobar bhabnatai Samaresh-ke chalito
korlo. Se dekhlo kajer meyeta kichu ekta bole arekbaar
chitkaar korte jachhe kintu tar mukh diye swar
berochhe na. Samaresh tao meyetake chepe dhore tar
mukhe ekta haat chapa dilo, sange sange-i se onubhob
korlo tar pithe keu hath rekhechhe: se hath boropher
mato thanda..

Se atokhon kheyal koreni je Sucheta-dir pasher ghorer
khola dorjatar dike se pichon kore dnariyechhilo.
Ghure dnaranor cheshtae tar pa ektu knepe ghyalo:
gharer kache thhanda hath-ta takhono..

Samaresh-er Somoshya (Saurav Mitra)

Gopal Bhar-er kothai ghar naarlen...aar thik tokkhoni
Black Out !!
Samaresh religiously ETV Bangla-r aie serial gulo
dekhe..aajo dekchilo...hotat Loadshedding..."du saala"
bole jolonto cigarette-ta janla diye fele dilo.
Samaresh emnite MNC-te bhalo chakri kore , ekhono biye
koreni...othocho or pichone teen teen-te meye aar teen
teen-te hobu shashuri dori jholabe bole boshe
achey..thik aie Raja-r moton dilemma...Kaake chere
kaake biye korbe.
Prothom jon-er naam Sucharita, Calcutta Univeristy-er
Political Science-r professor , didimoni didimoni haab
bhab, but ruchiboti. Samaresh-er besh pochondo oke.
Ditiyojon, Aruna , software firm-e chakri kore, cyat
dekhte...chokh-e mukh-e besh ekta buddhidipto bhab.
Samaresh oke thik bhorsha korte pare na but o jei
circle-r ghroa fera kore sheikhane Aruna is dee woman.
Aar tritiyojon-er naam Reshmi, boddo neka neka,ginni
ginni haabh bhaab.Samaresh oke aghaat dite chai na...
Samaresh aie rupkotha-r modern version serial gulo
dekhe personal life-r onek problems solve korte
pare.Aajker episode-ta tai or khubi relevant chilo.
KIntu hotat sala Loadshedding.
Baranda-i beriye eshey lokkho korlo loadshedding noi,
or apartment-er side -tai phase ta chole giyeche....or
pasher bari ...Sucheta -Di thaaken....onar ghor -e alo
jolche.Samaresh bhablo Sucheta-Di barite giye
episode-r baki onghso-ta dekhe ashben. Karon abki
sondhe-ta kichu korar nei Samaresh-er .Kaal shokkale
abar Bangalore-r flight dhorte hobe ,client-er shathe
meeting ache.Packing kichu korar nei,shokal-e jabe ,
bikel-r flight-e reutrn. Ta chara Sucheta Di pasher
bariri protibeshi,tar shatheo onekidn kotha hoi
ni.Samaresh bhablo jai du kotha bole ashi.
Nijer dorja-i chaabi dewar shomoi Smaresh lokkho
korlo, Sucheta Di-r baire dorja ta khola...calling
bell-e du bar bajalo , keu elo na...guti guti pa-e
...bhetore dhuke Samresh dekhlo...fan-er shathe dori
lagiye Sucheta Di jhulche....aatke uthlo
Samaresh....ey to suicide...
table-r opor paper weight-e tolai ekta note..."Amar
mrityu-r jonno Samaresh daiii"....obaak howar pala
Samresh-er thamache na...ki korbe bujhte parche na
Samaresh...emon shomoi Sucheta Di-r kaaj-er lok
ration-er bag niye ghore dhulo.....shey Samaresh-er
dike ek abr takiye aar Sucheta Di-r jhulonto shorir-ta
dekhe "o maaa go" kore chitkaar kore uthlo
..........................Samaresh tokhono bujhe utte
paarche naa ki korbe...aar to minute dui porei para-r
eke eke lok haajir hoye jabe...ki korbe Samaresh ????????????????????????????

Raja No .1 (Joon Chatterjee)

Episode 1: Raja No 1
From: Joon Chatterjee

Ek jae chilo Raja. Shei Rajar tin Rani chilo. Boro Rani khub bhalo gaan
gaito. Mejo Rani khub bhalo ranna korto. Aar Choto Rani khub shejegujae
Rajar sheba korto. Ebar Rajar ekdin khub mon kharap. Raja jantae chai kon
Rani kae niyae shae taar pasher rajje beratae jabae. Boro Rani bolae ami na
gaan gailae tomar raatae ghum
asbae na. Mejo Rani bolae ami na khabar raandhlae tumi na kheyei roga hoyae
jabae. Choto Rani bolae ami na shejegujae sheba na korlae tomar mon mejaj
bhalo thakbae na. Raja to confused! Kakae chere kaakae niye jabae? Edikae
invitation shudhu ekjon Ranir. Raja bollo aer uttor takae petei hobae. Ki
kore et uttor pabae, bhebei jachchae. Kae aer uttor ditae parbae? Mathai
aar kichui kulchchae ashchae na Rajar..Moharaj halka hote hote onar mathai
buddhi devi prokot holen.Poer din sokal er sobhai Raja ek sathe Birbol aar
Gopal Bhar ke uposthit hobar huk jari korlen...Porer din Sobhai, Raja
prabesh kore singhasane bostei Gopal Bhar egiye eshe abhibadon janalen.
Raja charpashe takalen kintu Birbal-ke dekhte pelen na. Takhon ek
rajkarmochari egiye eshe bhay-kampit sware bollo "Maharaj,
Birbal.....janiyechen....je
tini.....maha (big pause) byasto, ekhon tini ashte parben na." Ekatha shune
Raja to khepe laal. Singhasan chhere laafiye othen arki. Bollen "Kiiiiiii!
Birbal-er
etodur ashpardha! Rajagya amanyo koreche! Taar opore erokom oudhattyo!
Sepaira. ekhoni giye Birbal-ke bendhe niye esho." Priyo patro, Gopal Bhar
takhon Rajar pashe giye taake anek cheshtay shanto korlen. Bollen "Maharaj,
ektu bhebe dekhun. ChaturSreshto Birbal jakhon aapnar daaker erokom jabab
diyechen,taar pechone nischoi kono gurho karon thakbe."


Raja takhon.......................

To be continued...

A game in which the rules are as follows:
1. Someone will start telling a story. The next person will have to follow
up and maintain the thread of emails. Number the episode in the Subject
line. You may give a name to the episode too.
2. Each person can write a minimum of 1 line and maximum of approximately
20 lines (upto you).
3. One can write on anything and anything and anything... keeping in mind
that there should be a build up of the story. Whether it will be a Tragedy
or a Comedy or a Thriller or a Nonsense, its your call!


This story-writing episode had begun in year 2006 with 5 contributors by members of BSSM, you can continue the thread
as an author or write in the comments Section. In whatever which way, we will publish the entire thing in our
Puja Magazine.
Thanks
Saurav